Hooked On Facts:

Got gas? 40% of all indigestion remedies sold in the world are bought by Americans.

Dueling is legal in Paraguay, as long as both parties are registered blood donors.

When you eat too much, your hearing becomes less sharp.

Every U.S. president with a beard has been a Republican.

Bananas aren’t fruit! They are a type of herb.

In Pakistan, goats are often sacrificed to improve the performance of the stock market.

In Kentucky, 50% of the people who get married for the first time are teenagers.

If you unfolded your brain, it would cover an ironing board.

Opossums are immune to rattlesnake venom!

In an average lifetime a person will walk the equivalent of three times around the world.

7-11 sells 10,000 pots of coffee an hour, every hour, every day.

Brought to you by HookedOnFacts.com

Just Joking:

Helping The Drunk:

A couple is in bed sleeping when there’s a rat-a-tat-tat on the door. The husband rolls over and looks at the clock, and it’s half past 3 in the morning. “ I’m not getting out of bed at this time,” he thinks, and rolls over. Then, a louder knock follows. So he drags himself out of bed, goes downstairs, opens the door, and there’s a man standing there. It didn’t take the homeowner long to realize the man was drunk.

“Hi there,” slurs the stranger, “Can you give me a push?”

“No, get lost. It’s half past three and I was in bed,” says the man as he slams the door. He goes back up to bed and tell his wife what happened.

“That wasn’t very nice of you. Remember that night we broke down in the pouring rain on the way to pick the kids up from the baby-sitter and you had to knock on that man’s house to get us started again? What would have happened if he’d told us to get lost?”

“But the guy was drunk,” says the husband. “It doesn’t matter,” says the wife.” He needs our help and it would be the Christian thing to help him.” So the husband gets out of bed again, gets dressed, and goes downstairs. He opens the door, and not being able to see the stranger anywhere, He shouts, “Hey, do you still want a push?”

And he hears a voice cry out, “Yeah, please.” So, still being unable to see the stranger he shouts, “Where are you?” The drunk replies, “Over here, on the swing.”

Nervous Taxi Driver:

A passenger in a taxi leaned over to ask the driver a question and tapped him on the shoulder. The driver screamed, lost control of the cab, nearly hit a bus, drove up over the curb, and stopped just inches from a large plate glass window.

For a few moments everything was silent in the cab, and then the still shaking driver said, “I’m sorry but you scared the daylights out of me.”

The frightened passenger, apologized to the driver, and said he didn’t realize a mere tap on the shoulder could frighten him so much.

The driver replied, “No, no, I’m sorry, it’s entirely my fault. Today is my first day driving a cab.... I’ve been driving a hearse for the last 25 years.”

Ice Fishing:

A blonde wanted to go ice fishing. She’d seen many books on the subject, and finally, after getting all the necessary “tools” together, she made for the nearest frozen body of water.

After positioning her comfy footstool, she started to make a circular cut in the ice. Suddenly, from the sky, a voice boomed, “THERE ARE NO FISH UNDER THE ICE!”

Startled, the blonde moved further down the ice, poured a Thermos of cappuccino. And began to cut yet another hole. Again, from the heavens, the voice bellowed, “THERE ARE NO FISH UNDER THE ICE!”

The Blonde, now quite worried, moved way down to the opposite end of the ice, set up her stool, and tried again to cut her hole. The voice came once more. “THERE ARE NO FISH UNDER THE ICE!” She stopped, looked skyward,
and said, “Is that you, Lord?”

The voice replied, “No...this is the manager of the hockey rink...”